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I am a white, Christian, American woman and am having a very hard time with my best friend’s (also a white, Christian, American) recent announcement that she is getting married to a Muslim, African man (from Ghana) that I have never met.
She and I are extremely close, more like sisters and have been friends/ roommates for years.
She is able to appreciate other culture, overcome stereotypes and think outside the box.
The way she thinks and processes her views now is no longer the same as when she hasn’t left the US. Just like those missionaries who’ve done community work in the mountains, they experience crisis of falling in loved with the simplicity of life of the indigenous people that they would rather stay in the wild than go back to the civilization.
Will she be the only wife or a polygamous marriage is possible? Most likely the children will grow up Muslims, what’s her stance towards it? Although an intercultural and interfaith marriage can possibly be driven by rebellion, seeking the parents’ blessings can contribute to the success of marriage (I know this is debatable but a lot of marriages that are unblessed by parents are said to struggle).I have been on matchcom and lately I have been getting a lot of e mails from Ghana. Never one on a weekend, I usually had to write first.The frist one was suspicious but I wrote back stating I had no money to send. Finally I pulled the plug and that is when I got flooded with e mails from Ghana. They are good at removing a suspicious profile when there members complain about it.Therefore I believe that this “clouded judgment” crisis may not apply to her. If you can afford to go visit your friend a few months before September, that would give you a chance to evaluate the fiancé before the marriage occur.Right now, you can’t make a fair judgment about him because you haven’t met him in person.