Dating a musician support group bbw 100 dating
It’s not about you—it’s about the band and the show. Things like driving band members to and from the airport, running for coffees during soundcheck, packing up after the show while the band are schmoozing (crucial if you want to get out of there faster) can all become sources of resentment if you don’t do them with an open heart and attitude of helpfulness. I’m lucky in that, for the most part, I do love all of the musicians my husband plays with; they are stellar individuals.
So do yourself a favor: during soundcheck make sure you take a little time for yourself, have a snack or something more substantial and spend a few minutes resting. More often than not, you won’t be thanked for your efforts. But there will always be folks that you just don’t completely resonate with. Musicians have a very deep bond and share an intimacy that you will never be part of, no matter how much you are around.
But the band is high from the show and the attention of the fans, and they get to share the intimacy of playing a show together with all the attendant highs, lows, sick drum solos, sweet harmonies and eye contact with the crowd. I know that you want to be the devoted wife/girlfriend/main squeeze of your hot musician dude, but here’s the thing, if you don’t take care of yourself, you’ll end up strung out and depleted as per above.
I’ve been doing this for eight years now and have learned a few things along the way. The best way you can support your man is by looking after yourself (at the appropriate time) so that you can be the smiling goddess he wants you to be.
The last thing he needs is someone else to take care of.
You may be selling merch’ after the show and here, smiling is very important.
and again and again the same patterns would repeat themselves that led to us breaking up. I perfected the “watchful girlfriend off to the side” stance — not possessively hovering too close, but also making it clear to both him and the other chicks that I was watching. You’ll be expected to go to not just some gigs, but probably their shows. Make no mistake: these are all serious things to consider if you’re dating a successful musician. But if you’re also a night owl, then this relationship could work out great. We put our souls into what we do, so we can’t help but take it very, very personally if people don’t like it — even if we’ve become successful doing it professionally. If you go to bed with a writer, expect to wake up with shit written about you.
I have nothing but the nicest things to say about most of them . It’s normal to feel a little jealous, but there’s no point in getting too insecure because this will happen after show. If I’m in a relationship with someone, I of course want to support their career, but going to a bunch of gigs, especially ones that are late at night, can be a pretty hearty time commitment. Speaking as one of those people, it takes awhile to develop thick skin. This is another fact: unless he and his bandmates are explicitly sober, they’re going to be around alcohol and probably drugs, too, and oftentimes getting it for free. This is a saying from my friend, our former “Mind Of Man” columnist John De Vore.
Don’t take my swearing-off musicians as a warning, per se. They have intense relationships with their band mates that will be more important to them than the relationship they have with you. It’s a wonder anyone in a band has time for a romantic relationship given how much time they spend bickering with each other over big egos, women, money, and God knows what else. So handle with care: the sweet, sensitive guy who writes you love songs is also going to be sensitive about that nasty Pitchfork commenter. Your musician boo may not write songs about you, exactly, but about your relationship or love in general.
On the contrary, my loss is your gain — the more for you! Whether it’s an all-out Axl Rose and Slash situation or more of a slow-simmering Keith Richards and Mick Jagger resentment, band bros have more drama than the “Real Housewives” cast.