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—would often die in a quick and merciful way, but many Chats ended with an agreed-to meeting place, which was unusually convenient for both of us since, by the very nature of this whole game, we lived within a block of each other.exact location, I could see him on a map, too, in the shape of a red pushpin.horny singles in your area.) But since women are the sex that's less inclined to serial killing and wearing chin-strap facial hair, we employ a bit more of a vetting process.Most want to know that you're safe and normal and inclined to treat them like humans being So treat those first messages like a conversation with an amenable stranger in a club.Less darkly, what happened to the good old dinner party, the comically bad set-up date, the meet-cute fender bender? I'd soon learn that grinders weren't always bathroom-trysting and Rusty Tromboning and doing Japanese nose-torture on each other.Some grinders were as genteel as the ladies at a book club; some wanted true love, others new friendship.This subculture was populated with all sorts of people—like any community.Together the sex-crazed and lonely hearts and the rest were building a digital neighborhood on top of their physical one.

Sure, the lady may be all turnt up from a night of krumping or whatever (again: I don't go to clubs!

I knew to expect only one thing when our dot and pushpin met: that the guy wouldn't look much like his tiny picture. But the Grindr team, in September, was launching a new app, Blendr—which was not just for gay guys but for Everybody.

So a whole dumb show would ensue, in which we silently gestured at each other across the café or bar—first quizzically, then in some weird, fake recognition, as if, oh, how we went back, such memories, and things like that. It's a mad ambition, and I had no idea if Blendr would work.

If she's into it, she'll probably try to give you the green light in a way that won't leave you wondering.

If she's really up for getting together—or even just dirty phone stuff—she will indicate this.

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