The rules boys should know to dating

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If you wear cologne, no one should smell it from five feet away or five minutes after you’ve left 17.

Suck it up every now and then, especially for your family.

Hookers aren’t cool, but remember, the free ones are a lot more expensive.

Don’t gamble any amount of money that will piss you off if you lose.

Don’t use the word “closure” or ever expect it in real life.

If it’s got velvet ropes and lines, walk away unless you know someone. You cannot have a love affair with whiskey because whiskey will never love you back.

Just be content knowing that you are still better off than most who have ever lived. When you marry someone, remember you marry their entire family.

It’s okay to trade the possibility of your 80s and 90s for more guaranteed fun in your 20s and 30s.

Pretty boys are obsessed with their looks, display narcissistic tendencies and have egos bigger than the Egyptian pyramids. But in reality, money is about facilitating spontaneity. The cliché is that having money is about not wasting time. Remember: You die twice, once when you stop breathing, and again when somebody mentions your name for the last time. When you admire the work of artists or writers, tell them. If she expects the person you are 20% of the time, 100% of the time, then she doesn’t want you.

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